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New Parents: Is Our Sex Life the Same as it Was When We Didn’t Have Kids

A normal and healthy sex life is an important part of any relationship. However, once children come into the picture, this sex life can often take a back seat. This can be due to more responsibility, more sleepless nights or even self-consciousness about physical changes.

While reading this step-by-step article can help you find the perfect bed for you and your partner, that bed may not see a lot of use (sleep or otherwise). If you notice a change, it is important to deal with this issue, and not simply let it continue in silence.

However, addressing this change (or even noticing it in the first place) can be challenging. This article is going to go over not only how to identify if your sex life is the same, but also what to do if things have changed for the worse.

How to Identify a Change and How to Bring it Up

Realizing there has been a change in your sex life should generally be quite easy. You will likely notice that it has been happening less frequently, has been less intense or simply isn’t the same experience that it once was. This is quite common after a child, and even long after, so don’t feel embarrassed if it is happening in your relationship.

So if one or both of you have noticed a change, what is the best way to bring it up? While there is no perfect way, it is often better just to be honest about it and start a conversation. Whatever you do, do not shame or blame the other person for the issue. Be sure to bring it up in a calm and supportive way. Instead of shifting blame or asking questions of your partner, approach it as an issue for both of you to work on together.

How to Get Things Back to the Way They Were

Now that it is out in the open that your sex life is not the same since children have come around, how can you go about making changes and getting things back to normal? Well, the first thing to do is rediscover the romance. With a new child and a busy life, romantic dinners and dates and even cuddling with each other has likely slowed down or stopped.

Make an effort to do romantic things together, whether that be a dinner date, or a nice relaxing movie at home. Don’t immediately rush back into sex and force it, but rediscover the passion and take things slow. You also need to be open with each other about your thoughts and feelings. You need to also be attentive to one another and take time to be present.

If these types of things aren’t working, you could try sex therapy. A sex therapist is educated and experienced when it comes to helping people improve their situations, and get to the root cause of the issues. Sex therapy, in the best case, is a great way to move past mental or physical challenges to once again enjoy your sex life together.

While it is impossible to tell if your sex life will get back to what it once was, it certainly isn’t doomed to be nonexistent forever simply because you experienced a bit of a rough patch.

In conclusion, we hope this article has been able to help you identify if your sex life is still the same after children. If it’s not, the tips and information in this article can hopefully get you back on the right track.

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